Relationship – Spirituality – Evolution

Sacred Heart Space Relationship Blog


Hugh and Lasare offer food for thought in the Sacred Heart Relationship Coaching blogs. Here we discuss the underpinnings of relationships, how we create our experiences, how we can learn from each other, our manifestations, hear our inner guidance and trust the journey in our relationships. We welcome your comments, questions and feedback.

 

HOW TO HANDLE STRESSFUL TIMES….

Handling Stressful Times As a coach, I often meet people in great stress as they are facing circumstances that don’t please them, aware of ‘the gap’ between where they are and where they want to be. They reach out because they want help finding faith and some tools to help them get their life feeling back on track. The very nature of our contracted, stressful, angry states mean that faith and trust feel sorely out of reach. We find our wheels spinning and repetitive thoughts dominating our awareness. Faith is the ability to envision and believe in something as yet unseen, which is a big ask when there’s a hairy problem acting out in our lives! I first offer some soothing, my faith that no-one here is broken, this is just a temporary experience offering the chance to deepen self-love and renew choices. We explore the fears and beliefs being triggered by their situation. We consider that perhaps the way things are, is not absolute proof of all being terribly wrong, but a beautifully crafted set up that highlights dynamics within the psyche that could do with some loving and some rewriting and that we can do. As we unpack the fears and seeming limitations, we find the parts that need to be heard and considered. When we give voice to these parts, we generally find they are very young aspects that are feeling overwhelmed by circumstances that seems larger than them. When we are contracted by stress, it’s impossible to access the broader aspects of ourselves that can see a way forward. We are in ‘the gap’. When... read more

New Choices, MORE You!

Are you really ready to change? At the core of our experiences, what defines us are the choices that we allow ourselves to make. When we feel connected to our dreams and ready to make new choices, then we become more of ourselves… Each moment of everyday, we are faced with infinite opportunities to decide which way our expectations will go. Through our love of safety, we tend to put great store by continuity, reminding ourselves of the story of our lives, how we got where we are, whom we consider ourselves to be, what we want to avoid or achieve and our relation to the others we assess around us… Are we better than them, less something or other than them? We tell ourselves why we are where we are and often make a habit of telling others too, assuming that it’s important that they know too! Today I invite you to consider the ‘story’ that you woke up to, how quickly you searched for your place in it, perhaps even having to dig around for the memory of where you were up to yesterday! Is it a story of struggle, uphill efforts, laden with the weight of history or responsibility, tethered to fat strands of storyline, not enough money, dissatisfying work, health issues niggling at you…Did you wake up and reach for yesterday’s place in the story? Well how about entertaining this notion…When we sleep, we drop the density and leave our physical bodies, refocussing in the higher dimensions of our Divinity! Just like the pre-birth state, we are aware of ourselves in infinite oneness and limitless... read more

Pleasure as a Way of Life….

  Pleasure is Soul Work! It’s a lovely word isn’t it…pleasure…just say it to yourself and notice how your mouth almost forms a smile as you speak it… ‘It’s my pleasure’…if you are really paying attention you might notice that your whole body responds to this word! I found just now the feeling spread into my heart region as I said it. What is pleasure? Is it just it be seen as a little snack to be found here and there, to be grasped like it might not come back again? Or do you relate to pleasure as your birth right, a natural arising to be relished each and every day?   Personally I choose the latter! In fact, if I’m not feeling pleasure of some kind or another, I look for ways to respond to myself as soon as possible! You see, pleasure is the sign of the body and mind relaxed and appreciative, it means that our senses are alert to the myriad ways that life is bringing us blessings. As we feel pleasure we send out multiple signals into our world that we are well, we are receptive, we are deserving, we are fulfilled..   Of course sometimes pleasure has really not been a daily feature of someone’s life, a traumatic childhood, a loveless marriage, a time of feeling lost at sea.. we all know the challenges and scenarios of the human race. I understand very well how empty life can feel at times. But what I’d love to inspire in you is the inclination to explore pleasure as a wonderful path back to self-love and... read more

The Power of Self Nurturing for Women

  Why do you need to nurture yourself and how do you do it and when!? Before answering those questions I will start with a bit about myself and how I found the answers for me! Once upon a time, as a child and then a young woman, I used to feel very fragile, regularly buffeted by the prevailing forces. I traveled from situation to situation, from school to home, traversing my world, confused by my relationship dramas, all too aware of the wobbliness of my feelings within.. Sometimes I felt on top of the world, I felt bright and good inside, but then my light would dim and I’d wonder why I felt somehow broken, how to make my path in life and to develop the faith in myself I needed. In the living with those questions and through daring to become the heroine of my own tale, I’ve launched myself into the void more times than I could tell, seeking freedom from constriction and to develop the power I needed to create the life of my dreams. Over the years I’ve grown that core of strength and self-knowledge, that guides me like my own North Star .I’ve traveled away from my family and comfort zones. I’ve learned what ‘the shadow’ really means for me, I’ve tried and tested so many healing modalities and trained in quite a few of them too. I’ve practiced at home, on my front lines, seeing daily how I can bring about change where it’s most needed, I’ve prayed and danced and learnt conscious breathing under great duress. In time I cleaned up... read more

What is Faith and how do we get some?

  I found this question forming in me when I was quite a small child and indirectly it has been at the core of my life’s searching ever since. I heard the priest at our church speak a lot about faith, but with no explanation. He spoke of it as if it was a necessity to have and I wondered how I would know if I had some! Did the lady next to me have some faith. If so, where did she get it from and was there something wrong with me if I didn’t have this magical sounding quality? I gave up the searching in churches soon after, as they didn’t seemed to offer guidance, inspiration and instruction that nourished me. But my search for answers pushed on… I knew I had something bright and effective inside of me, though it was an on/off affair, yet despite years of efforts to explore spirituality and my psyche, I still didn’t understand faith. Was it just the ability to pretend that everything was ok and that I expected only the best? Was it imagining that a higher power that I couldn’t see, hear or touch was going to make everything better? This didn’t seem reliable or practical to me, and surely the way that the priest had earnestly advised us to use our faith, had implied that it was an infinitely useful quality to have. It wasn’t until I discovered the channelled teachings of Abraham Hicks that I found the specific and technical answers to the longing I had. Here Faith was described as the ability to feel something and... read more

Integration

  I am both man and woman Angel and demon Sun and moon Light and darkness Yin and yang Earth, wind, fire and water Are the constructs of my keeping I carry within me a song as old as all creation Which I hold in safe keeping For a time of revelation Whereupon I shall step fully into the arena Unfolding my true colours I will lay me down to die So that others may live So that humanity can grow beyond Its self-made boundaries Towards its destiny Give me the powers of the king but for a day So that I can show you the way  (….I have learnt to live, in the wild woods, far from the captive masses. This decision has created my own space, enabling me to live outside the cultural enclosure. Each day I swim in the clear crystal pool of the wood and turn gold from head to foot. There my wounds are healed by the earth father; there I am at one with my white shadow, who is my other self. I need no tools to do my work, nor heat to keep me warm. Here I am not lonely for all creation is at my... read more

Inner Guidance, the feedback in our lives

Sometimes we don’t know which way to turn. We have a decision to make, a project to start, a relationship or job to end. How do we know what is the right choice to make? One way to discern this is to imagine making one choice and see if you feel lighter inside or a sense of heaviness or dullness. If something is for your betterment, your inner guidance will respond with a good feeling, a sense of relief. How does your world respond to your efforts? When doors open, you meet others that reflect positively your interest, you find information showing up, and you feel uplifted exploring it, then you are getting a big yes! That’s the basic feedback that I look for… If it feels like I am trying to push for something to happen, then I know that either the timing is off, or I am not really aligned with it. A subject viewed from a bad mood will rarely lead you to experiences that you will look back on with pleasure. Sure you may learn something about yourself in the process. But choosing to raise your vibration to a higher level before looking for work, making that important phone call is one of the most fundamental and useful practices that you can embrace. The range of options open up exponentially when we are in a positive state and changing our mood is far more in our control than we sometimes admit. Ask yourself what you most want, to prove your pity story, or to live the life of your dreams! If you are ready to... read more

Shadow Work

When you notice something in a person that deeply activates you, triggering a negative emotional response, do not judge it, do not deny or abandon the feeling, move towards it, open your heart to that person, empathise with them, embrace the feeling. The activating person is not the cause of the emotional response, they are but a mirror into your psyche … for what you see is a lost aspect of yourself, that wants to be invited back home to you, your greater self … If you can recognise, welcome and even love this dark or shadow self, learning to accept it, then the healing can flow and growth can ensue. This is regenerative shadow work – only in the shadow, will you find the missing parts of yourself that are essential for the journey ~ without integrating them, you will arrive at your destination, bereft of your... read more

Self-love- how do you do it?

If you are anything like me, when you first started hearing the phrase ‘you gotta love yourself’, you thought well how on earth do I do that? Obviously if we are hearing it, someone thinks we aren’t doing a good enough job of loving ourselves already! How do they know…what do self-loving people do differently and were they born like it, or do we all have to learn how to do it? I think many of us do need to… I’ve been on a journey with those questions…probably like most of you reading this. I’ve learnt that to me self-love means being honest with my preferences, saying yes and no when that’s what I mean. I also feel self-love when I nurture myself well. Eating lovely food in an enjoyable environment, taking time to stop and celebrate the rolling hills and sunsets, expressing myself through my clothes and music and developing friendships that are mutually satisfying and enriching. I take a look around my life in a 360 from time to time and look at all my reflections. What do my home/body/work/relationship life/health/friendships tell me about my self-awareness and self-love? It is really wonderful to be able to ‘own’ the reflections when they are pleasing, to trust that anything good in my life is there because I attracted it. I see my life as my art and I love to see it all as a glorious work in progress. It is hard going too when a glaring area of lack is suddenly brought into focus. Yet it is in those moments of contrast in our lives that we define... read more

The Masculine and Feminine Inside of You!

Many of us know of the Yin-yang symbol of Taoist origins standing for the masculine and feminine – but how much do you notice the principles it points to in your everyday life? The symbol shows two interconnected shapes, one black, and one white, with a dot of the opposite colour contained in it. Do you recognise your masculine energy (yang) in action? Do you feel and notice the feedback of your feminine (yin) energetic sensitivities? They are fantastically helpful to be aware of and can bring great balance between our masculine and feminine and understanding to our relationships and life in general. Yang predominates as an energetic force in males, but is also a force that we females use too. It is our go-getting, manifesting, make happen, creational energy. It defines our interests, our focus, protects our concerns.. Yin is our stillness, the responding, feeling, receiving aspect of our consciousness. It is the all watching, noticing, quivering with feeling part of us that is most often recognised as a characteristic of females, but as the symbol shows is inherent in males too. It is clear looking back over the last century in particular, that women have been developing a deeper connection to their masculine energies, taking over farming, manufacturing and commerce during the wars, rolling their sleeves back and feeling their accomplishments. After the wars came the backlash from the group psyche, having re-established safety in their countries, men in their many thousands crashed and burned, relaxed with a joint, dove into the many arms of the feminine and discovered how they really felt about warring and being... read more